In what is presumably a piece of positive discrimination that you'd possibly imagine wouldn't be frowned upon by Race Discrimination Commissioner, Dr Tim Soutphommasane of the Australian Human Rights Commission, Amaysim is not celebrating April Fool's Day early, but is instead celebrating St Patrick's Day by doing a special deal for people named Patrick or Patricia.
Apparently everyone else won't be blessed with the luck of the Irish unless their names are of the right Saintly sort, but if your name starts with P but doesn't end with "atrick" or "atricia" then, possibly, you can "p off" as Basil Fawlty put it, except down to the pub, and drown your sorrows in a pint of Guinness.
Presumably anyone wishing to change their name by deed poll to take advantage of the deal will find it's way too late to do so, with this article suggesting any name change takes weeks to take effect.
Well, for St Patrick's Day only, Amaysim says that "anyone in Oz named Patrick or Patricia that signs up to one of amaysim’s amazingly simple plans across mobile, energy or broadband for the first time will get one on us. One free mobile or broadband renewal via cashback or $125 energy credit".
Amaysim says its "foireann sonraí," which means "data team" in Irish, reports "also been having some fun of its own, with a scan of its 1.1 million-strong customer base revealing":
- Over 64,000 text messages were sent from Australia to Ireland in 2017;
- More than 58,000 calls were placed from our shores to Ireland, across 648,000 call minutes;
- To put those minutes into context, that is the Irish national anthem Amhrán na bhFiann over 230,000 times, or Westlife’s #1 album Coast to Coast over 14,000 times; and
- Responsible for most of these calls and texts traveling over 15,000 km to the Emerald Isle are people with the surnames Byrne, Ryan, O’Brien and Murphy.
Julian Ogrin, chief executive of amaysim, who clearly has no fear of Dr Soutphommasane, said the company’s mission is "to help customers untangle life’s complexities and give them just what they need – whether it’s the ability to change plans every 28 days, or to wish their family back home ‘top of the morning’."
Orgin said: “On this occasion, those called Patrick or Patricia are holding the four-leaf clover with the offer of our home services on us, but irrespective of their name, nation or craic, all amaysim customers receive the celebratory benefits of our transparent pricing and no-lock in contracts.”
Naturally, Amaysim’s has plenty more information for everyone, whether named Patrick, Patricia or anything else, on its range of "no lock-in contracts across mobile, energy and broadband" here.
As per usual, Terms and Conditions Apply, whether you're named Patrick or Patricia, and you can purposefully pore over them here (PDF link).